People who use substances often act in erratic ways that are disturbing and sad to family and friends. Even though it might seem like something is off, family and friends are less likely to think someone is using drugs or drinking too much unless they have seen the signs for years. Without realizing what is behind it all, they may not know what is really going on for quite some time. When a loved one is addicted to substances, it takes a hard reality check to figure out how to get them to see how it impacts everyone around them. Once you identify the three most common behaviors exhibited by people with addiction, you are more likely to know how to help them.
When a person with an addiction is hiding their drug use, they may be covering up for the fact that they feel other people are to blame for their life, their job losses, lack of relationships, and more. The family may appeal to them but addiction will always be stronger in that they will continue to play the victim and blame others. The power has to shift from wanting the drugs less than they want to give up blaming others for their troubles and begin the journey of healing in recovery.
Lies and Half-Truths
Misleading people is easy for individuals with addiction because it keeps everyone in the dark about their drug use. The more they need drugs, the more lies and half-truths they have to tell. The more likely they are to lie to cover up all the other lies and continue manipulating others to get what they want. Trust is broken by people who are in the throes of addiction. Even family and friends will tire of this eventually. When things start adding up, it helps to write them down and keep track. Make note of all the times they ask for money and what it is for. Ask them how it’s going and how that thing you helped fix is coming along. Over time, if you are right, you might find that loved one has lied and used money or other things that are given to them for drugs. Don’t blame them as much as you blame the addiction and be gracious enough to step into their world and ask them to seek help. They are desperate to quit, even if it may not seem so at the moment.
Many people begin committing crimes while addicted to drugs or alcohol out of necessity. Some do it because they are doing risky things while addicted and not thinking straight. Others sell everything they own, steal, lie, and borrow but still need money to finance their addiction. There are no depths to how far a desperate person will go who are addicted to drugs or alcohol. With prescription drug addiction, crimes may look a little different with forged prescriptions or stealing from medicine cabinets. However, the risk is the same. Drugs change a person’s personality which can make them more aggressive or result in assault and domestic violence charges. Some drugs may deplete a person’s sense of respect they have for themselves and they, in turn, end up in prostitution or some other activity that puts them at greater risk for their health and well-being. Anytime criminal behavior may be suspected, it is wise to look into whether addiction is also present.
Hope for healing comes from understanding that loved ones don’t want to be addicted to substances, lie, cheat, steal, or do things to harm themselves and others. They are in need of help and likely desperate for you to notice. If you notice the signs of potential drug and alcohol use, help is available for all those who struggle, including loved ones of those with addiction.
The Last Resort provides a safe, supportive environment for men in a retreat-like setting. Nature is an important component of recovery and healing. We strive to provide a place of enrichment that cultivates the inner as well as the outer journey of recovery. However you find your way to the Last Resort, we endeavor to provide a haven where you can journey through recovery feeling like your life and story have meaning and a purpose. Call us to find out more: 512-750-6750.