Finding a way to help a loved one fight addiction is not easy. It can feel like losing an uphill battle against something bigger than everyone around. When it is a brother who is struggling, it takes a strong will and determination to speak with them about what is going on. Try some tips to work with a brother who is struggling with addiction.
If a brother does not trust his family, he is not likely to want to listen to their advice or heed their warnings. This is difficult for family members because it makes them less able to reach him to offer support. Adult siblings often become estranged when addiction enters the picture. To build trust, it is important in conversation about the addiction to avoid:
- Lecturing about it
- Criticizing or demeaning their choices and behavior
- Drinking or using any drugs around them
- Calling names
Quite often, it is emotionally exhausting to cope with a loved one who has addiction. Their behavior has probably caused a lot of pain for the family. It is more helpful to be kind and support them, so they know they have help. Show them unconditional love and that you are not afraid of boundaries.
Plan an Intervention
Holding an intervention can encourage your brother to get help. Narcotics Anonymous notes the most important stage of an intervention is selecting a family to attend. Family members are the ones who have witnessed this first hand. Any person who argues with them or antagonizes them should not be allowed inside the circle. This is not a time to set the brother up for failure. It is time to set him up for an opportunity to seek some help and finally resolve the problems he has in his life with addiction.
If a brother decides to seek treatment following a discussion or intervention, there should be family-wide support for the individual. It is important to respect the brother’s privacy if they do not want others to know about it. It is their treatment. Avoid asking them about too much if they don’t want to share. Pressure can make them feel less capable of handling what’s ahead for them and make them scared. Supporting them and offering an open, listening ear is always best.
It is healthy to clearly state feelings about it or about what they are learning in rehab and hold boundaries, but do not try to blame or criticize them. Learning how to help them will be the best course of action that can be taken. With trusted therapists in a respected program that helps them directly, they are getting what they need. Now, they need the support of loved ones to carry them through from rehab to recovery, and beyond.
The Last Resort provides a safe, supportive environment for men in a retreat-like setting. By being in nature, we believe men can tap into a certain place in rehab that brings them closer to their goals of recovery. Call us to find out more: 512-750-6750.